


How Much is Too Much?

by celestial_ringleader



Category: The Greatest Showman (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Aphrodisiacs, Based on a Tumblr Post, Dry Humping, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Masturbation, Overstimulation, PWP, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post-Canon, Sex Pollen, Smut, and the people running them, barlyle - Freeform, how do i even tag, i blame the askblogs on tumblr, i blame the tgs discord for this, okay ill stop tagging now, phillip carlyle needs a reward for putting up with pt's antics, pt barnum needs a nap, pt's a little dumb at times but he's trying his best, self indulgent smut, some fluff at the end, this is just me wanting to write out my own weird kinks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-19
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-22 23:05:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17068886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celestial_ringleader/pseuds/celestial_ringleader
Summary: Now Barnum remains here, alone and pondering on his bed, wondering if he should try to impress his partner with this “gift” (which he knows is more than likely a load of humbug) or simply let it be and move on.OrPT decides to try something new without thinking things through first.





	How Much is Too Much?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> This was something I've wanted to write and post here for a while and it was based on a tumblr post (i dont know how to link it but yeah) from the Barnum askblog and I *may* have taken it too far xD  
> Lo and behold my first smut writing would be centered around my fav having a hell of a day.  
> I promise I'll get around to writing more but with the holidays coming up it's been hard to actually have the time to sit around and write something.  
> This was beta'd by the amazing @Schizanthus (thank you so much again)  
> Anyways enjoy and please leave comments and kudos!

The small box of mysterious powder sitting on Barnum's desk bothers him to no end, bringing with it the question of whether the gift could be interpreted as something more of an insult than anything meant in kindness.

 

Barnum of course knows that he is by no means old and “past his prime” (he likes to believe a man like him doesn't simply fall out of “his time”) and likes to pride himself on still being active both in work and in the bedroom.

 

However, as of late, he has begun to doubt whether he has enough stamina to accommodate for his partner, Phillip. They have been together for some months and while Barnum can keep up with him for the most part, he finds himself lacking in energy when Phillip wakes him in the middle of the night fully hard and trembling for sex.

 

Overwhelmed isn't what Barnum would call it, but perhaps a little… disheartened. He never thought twice about the nearly ten year age gap between himself and Phillip until the previous night when Barnum simply hadn’t the energy to go one round when Phillip had enough energy to power a fleet of trading ships!

 

Barnum shakes off those intrusive thoughts, focusing back on the box sitting on his bedside drawer. Of course the gift itself is... unique, for a lack of better words. Barnum had received this as a birthday present from one of his closer friends, Deng Yan; she told him it was a natural aphrodisiac, able to give even an elderly man on the brink of death the energy to go for hours. Apparently, she meant this as a way for Barnum to not feel discouraged when in the bedroom with someone as energetic and lively as Phillip. Of course he chided her for claiming he was “elderly” and begrudgingly took the present, making sure to tell her he is fully capable and hardly at the end of his prime and that he was accepting it just so she wouldn't get upset that her sentiments were rejected. For the months he's had the box, Barnum has kept it buried in his bottom-most drawer, abandoned and almost forgotten until this very moment.

 

Now he remains here, alone and pondering on his bed, wondering if he should try to impress his partner with this “gift” (which he knows is more than likely a load of humbug) or simply let it be and move on.

 

After another ten minutes spent in thought, Barnum decides that he should at least give it a _try_. What harm could someone do exploring new and exciting things about the human body? He considers how much excitement this would bring to Phillip. Barnum recalls vaguely the instructions Deng gave him when presenting him with the box, but decides this is a special occasion.

 

Barnum reads aloud the instructions on the small piece of paper folded in the box, “Take one spoonful and mix it in warm water thoroughly. Drink gradually over a period of an hour. Follow instructions carefully to prevent risks or injuries.” He scowls at the paper, crumbling it up and shoving it in his pocket with renewed self-confidence. “Please, like this will actually work, let alone pose potential for injuries.,” he grumbles to himself, retrieving a mug and filling it with coffee, not bothering to add sugar. “Why am I even doing this? This is ridiculous.”

 

He takes a spoon from his drawer then, against all precaution, takes five spoonfuls of the powder and mixes it into his coffee. Perhaps it may have been a little _too_ much but he can dwell on that later.

 

Barnum gives the box one last sniff before closing it, feeling slightly lightheaded as he takes his cup to the breakfast nook, the box left abandoned on the counter.

 

**\------**

 

Not even an hour later, Barnum already began to feel weird.

 

As he readies himself for the day ahead, he cannot help but feel wary about the odd, uncomfortable feeling within him, his concern heightening when he so much as grazes his hand by his nether regions, feeling a shock wave go through his whole body. Barnum shrugs it off, hoping that work will set his mind off of it for the time being, at least until he gets some alone time with Phillip.

 

~~

 

The carriage ride itself was long. Even without the tired feeling or negative fog over his head, the ride was quite long and strenuous, full of  uneven roads and bumps along the way. Now with this growing predicament (among other things), the whole ride felt doubled, no tripled in length. Barnum starts to feel tight in his own trousers and knows that this day is certainly going to be a long one as well.

 

He looks down and, to his surprise and horror, sees that he's fully hard although he hasn't even properly touched himself in the slightest.

 

At least he knows the powder worked and it wasn't some gimmick after all, but he slightly regrets using himself as a human guinea pig.

 

The unevenness of the road felt amplified as it spurred him on even more, the vibrations of the carriage feeling painfully exquisite on his throbbing cock just aching to be freed from his trousers. As much as he would like to go against any manners or “proper behavior” he has learned over the years and just finish himself off, he knows he just _can't_ . Barnum is not a quiet man, that he can admit to himself, in the public eye or behind closed doors with his lover it makes no difference, and seeing as how his body is reacting to mere _vibrations_ , he knows he certainly does not have the strength to keep himself to a volume that won't attract the attention of the driver or any passersby unfortunate enough to hear.

 

Barnum keeps his cane across his lap, his hands tightening around it until his knuckles turn white, a layer of sweat forming under his collar and just below his hairline.

 

He closes his eyes, counting back from ten to try and regain his composure, stalling his incoming completion (which from the telltale swell of heat in his hips and the way his body twitches, he can deduce is rapidly approaching). Leaning his head back against the carriage, he tries his best to think of anything that could encourage him away from that blissful precipice.

 

Despite any effort to suppress his desires, he still decides to move his legs together, just to give himself that extra friction to make this trip a little more bearable.

 

**\------**

 

After an awkward and hurried exchange with the driver and a short jog to his office, he's finally by himself once again, now able to fully assess the damage that the aphrodisiac has wrought on his poor body.

 

After removing his coat and top hat, he hastily sits behind his desk, shaking hands beginning to fumble down his trousers just enough to expose his-

 

_‘F-fuck…’_  he thinks to himself as his eyes land on his swollen cock.

 

Perhaps..the remedy worked a little _too_ well...

 

Barnum leans back in his chair, not taking his eyes off of his fully hard cock now leaning against his stomach, precum dripping down the side, giving the head a milky sheen. He covers his mouth with a sigh, his face feeling a million degrees warmer.

 

“ _Fuck my life…_ ” he mumbles under his breath as he rubs his face in embarrassment.

 

He removes his hands from his face, looking around the room once more despite already knowing he was alone, then back at his dick. Barnum finds himself hesitating, just watching as his cock twitches, making him shiver harshly. After a moment, he decides he can't keep withholding himself, at this rate he may burn alive! He sharply exhales through his nose in resignation before bringing his hand tentatively to it, wrapping his fingers around it loosely.

 

Barnum’s back grows tense, his shoulders rising up to his ears as his legs spread as far as they can within the confines of his chair. He knows he isn't out of practice, in fact he copulates more often than he ever did in the past, but whatever the Hell was in that powder seems to light his nerves on fire, every fiber of his skin is alight and electrified. Barnum's eyes roll to the back of his head when he starts moving his fist up and down at a steady pace, teasing his thumb around the exposed head, squeezing at the base only to glide his fist up slowly; sharp gasps leave him as his legs twitch and shake, his body continues to hunger for more despite how much he's giving it.

 

And by God is he going to give into it more if he has to.

 

It's not long until he's jerking himself in quick strokes, his hips bucking up to match the rhythm he set desperately with a soft slap of his hips hitting his hand, high and loud moans echoing off the ceiling after every erratic thrust. He throws a leg over the arm of the chair to gain more mobility, his free hand moving to feel his own chest as he writhes in his seat, thrusting up into his fist. Barnum is sure he looks like nothing more than a whiny bitch in heat, a cheap harlot with too much vigor for their own body.

 

Oddly, the thought has him moving quicker. He'll think about the effects of his own salacious thoughts later, not when he's being consumed by his own body heat.

 

God, he doesn't remember being this hot and bothered since he just hit puberty -- and he would rather not recollect how many years it's been since then -- but his mind can't and will not focus on that, the only thought going through his head is a burning need to complete himself, to jerk himself harder, to bring himself to the blissful end his body is screaming for...

 

When he feels his climax rapidly approaching once again, he unbuttons his shirt with his free hand, putting it between his teeth as he moves his hand faster and faster, moaning into the fabric, wetting it with his drool as he's encouraged quicker to the high he so painfully withheld himself from. Barnum closes his eyes, leaning his head back as he tries to think of something, anything to push himself over the edge.

 

He isn't surprised when the first image to bless his imagination is Phillip. Why wouldn't it be Phillip after those many nights of them spending hours with one another?

 

First it's the younger man stroking Barnum slowly; kissing his inner thigh, humming onto his flesh, his gorgeous blue eyes piercing Barnum’s hazel ones with a ravenous hunger. Then it's him beneath Barnum; being pounded into the bed hard, his high and whiny moans echoing in Barnum's eardrums, coming apart so perfectly under him, clawing at the sheets. Finally, it’s Phillip sat on his lap; hips rising and falling on Barnum's cock rapidly, his eyes glassy from pleasure as small gasps and moans escape him. One word leaves his lips like a desperate mantra:

 

_Phineas!_

 

And that's what has Barnum buckling in his seat with a high and desperate shout, his legs and hips twitching violently as hot spurts of come shoot out of him and across his chest, come covering his fist. A slur of incoherent curses leaves him as he jerks himself through it until his body finally settles and relaxes, a relieved sigh leaving him.

 

Barnum slumps in his chair like a dead weight, gulping in air as the last remaining tremors of his intense orgasm fade away. He doesn't even bother concerning himself about the mess he most certainly made, right now he's glad it's over with. Admittedly, it felt quite good, (Barnum can’t recall the last time he came that hard before Phillip) but he would rather be bedridden with pneumonia than endure that again.

 

Barnum makes a note in his mind to dispose of the powdery substance the moment he gets home.

 

After a moment spent in his afterglow, he decides he can't sit around like this all day, so he cleans himself and the desk up as best as he can. Lucky for him he has a spare pair of pants he can wear to replace the ones the current ones since they are no doubt soiled.

 

Barnum thinks he could say it was the cat, in case the cleaners wonder where the mysterious stains came from.

 

But now was not the time to dwell on that. For now, he has a pile of paperwork that needs sorting through.

 

**\------**

 

Barnum, despite being completely immersed in his work, raises his head at the sound of Phillip walking through the door, setting down his coat and hat beside Barnum's. A smile crosses the ringmaster’s lips,

 

“You're here early, sleeping beauty,” Barnum teases as he gets up, walking over to meet Phillip. “An hour before noon, a new record.” He kisses his lover once, wrapping his arms around him.

 

Phillip returns the kiss, hugging him back. “I'll have you know I have been up for a few hours already, I simply took my time fully waking over a book and a cup of coffee.” He pats Barnum on the back, pulling away to walk towards his own desk. “And it seems you got an early start as well.”

 

Barnum tries not to think of the events that dragged him here so early and instead formulates an excuse, “No time like the present, my darling, that's what I always say.”

 

“Phin, remember that you need to get rest, you're of no use to anyone if you're passing out in the ring.” Phillip gives him a stern look, stretching out his arms. “We didn't install a couch just so we would have a proper place for some alone time after shows.”

 

Barnum swallows hard as he watches Phillip stretch himself out, a blush crawling up his neck as a brief flash of one of those occasions flickers in his mind, every detail down to the small noises coming from his partner as Barnum rutted against him. He clears his throat, mentally shaking off those thoughts, “Yes, I remember that, I don't need sleep, I just need to keep myself busy.”

 

“Do I need to _remind_ you of what happened the last time you abandoned your sleep schedule? You were driven half to madness and you refused to nap even when I laid you onto the nearest bed and-” Phillip rambles on as Barnum starts to feel panic set in from his body reacting just to his partner’s words. Every punctuated syllable and smooth vowel echoes in Barnum's mind, making another shiver travel down his spine.

 

He startles visibly, realizing it wasn't just a passing fancy for his lover, but an exact repetition of what he felt before he entered the carriage, amplified by ten, hitting him all at once! Barnum becomes hyper aware that he's started to lean on Phillip's desk, his hips rolling minutely on the edge.

 

“-ineas, Phineas??”

 

Barnum snaps from his horror-induced trance, stalling all motion. “Yes?!”

 

“My God are you okay? You've been standing there in a trance for five minutes!” His co-ringmaster gives him a puzzled and worried look.

 

“I-I'm quite alright, darling, I just haven't been entirely focused is all.” Barnum gives him a smile, but it's a little strained, “Perhaps it was something in my coffee.” _Yes and if it doesn't stop, I will surely be driven mad!_

 

Phillip tilts his head, giving him a suspicious look. “Do you need a moment to relax, you look feverish.”

 

_Fuck._

 

Barnum felt another shiver go down his spine from the simple motion, his back going tense as he turns on his heel towards his desk. “I! Should be getting back to the paperwork!” The ringmaster quickly walks back to his desk, his head low as he sits down in a hurry, trying to conceal his lower half from his partner. “I! Forgot that I put it off! I should really finish it over here!” he says almost robotically, immediately beginning to write down numbers aimlessly on the banksheets to his left.

 

Phillip doesn't take his eyes off Barnum, but leaves him be for now.

 

“Okay, just let me know if you need anything, okay Phin?”

 

Barnum nods his head, “L-loud and clear, my darling!” He glances down to see himself hardening in his pants once again and curses under his breath, hoping that this time it will go away on its own. Barnum honestly doubts it, but you can't blame a man for being hopeful.

 

**\------**

 

Barnum now begins to question whether his self confidence is just sheer stupidity in disguise. For once, he wished he thought more like Phillip.

 

Phillip is always so solid in concepts of right and wrong, smart and quick-witted, and for the most part wise beyond comparison. Barnum wished he had thought that way, even just for a moment, before ensuring a day’s worth of torment.

 

Luckily, the troupe had free rein to rehearse as they pleased today, so Barnum had no reason to leave his office. Since Phillip was busy practicing on the lyra with Anne, he wouldn’t be disturbed for a few hours.

 

Which, of course, works out perfectly for Barnum since he can hardly stand without moaning outloud, let alone rehearse.

 

Part of him wants to seek out Deng Yan just to see if there's a way to flush the powder from his body, anything to relieve the pressure within him without straining his wrist. However, his own sense of dignity -- which is rapidly fading by the second or third time he's had to relieve himself -- keeps him chained to his seat.

 

Barnum subconsciously starts to roll his hips on his chair, trying to get more friction on his throbbing cock which has been fighting against his trousers -- the second pair he's had to use this hour -- as weak sounds leave him. After an eternity of being unable to focus on his work, he decides to stand up and pace around the room, nervously humming to himself, moving his hands around, trying to will away his aching erection. Barnum doesn't know why he begins to hop in place, smacking his own legs to an internal rhythm, clicking his heels on the ground; he assumes his usual nervous habits are now being multiplied from the situation he's in.

 

“ _And buried in your bones there’s an ache that you can’t ignore. Takin’ your breath. Stealin’ your mind. And all that was real is left behind_ -” Barnum realizes his own lyrics aren't helping at all, the last thing he wants to think about is an ache he can’t ignore no matter how much he tries. He bends over, his hands on his knees as he takes deep breaths, gulping in air in an attempt to calm himself.

 

Barnum stands back up, his back stiff, looking down at the prominent bulge in his pants. “My wrist can only handle so much, give me a break…” He looks out of the corner of his eye at the couch pillows. Normally he wouldn't consider it, but now they seem oddly… tantalizing--

 

_No. No. I'm not going to hump a pillow like a preteen. Not happening._ He’s out of breath, his face feeling hotter by the second as his cock twitches painfully in his pants, “ _F-fuck…_ ” he brings his hands around to hold the area as his cock twitches repeatedly, wanting nothing more than to bury itself into something, or _someone_.

 

After a moment, at a complete loss of any kind of shame or self respect, he decides to just abandon any and all means of hiding, leaving the office in a hurry after Phillip.

 

**\------**

 

This was a mistake. A _huge mistake._

 

It seems that there must have been something else in the powder because he is now extremely hyper aware of _everything_.

 

Barnum can feel and smell everyone as he speedwalks around the tent in search of his target, who he knows is dancing in the center ring with Anne at that exact moment. Barnum swears he can smell Phillip’s expensive lavender cologne from halfway across the tent. He tries not to come into contact with anyone, moving fast enough to avoid any looks or possible conversations. Barnum was in no mood or headspace to chat.

 

Barnum is certain he looks like a madman, hurrying through the tent as if he were a shark in search of blood in the water, the blood being his posh little partner who's always ripe for the taking. He keeps his hands to his sides, moving in a way so no one could see the bulge in his trousers (which are regretfully a little too small for him, perhaps he grabbed Phillip's by accident), running until he hurries behind the bleachers in the main tent.

 

He bounds to the corner to have a full view of the center ring from his vantage point under the bleachers, making sure no one else is there. His eyes land right on Phillip, who is spinning and stretching on the lyra, while Anne gives him instructions from the ground. Barnum watches, licking his lips as he observes how Phillip's thighs tense around the metal hoop, his exercise clothes leaving little to the imagination as he does a full split.

 

Barnum palms himself a few times, biting his lower lip before stepping out into view, removing his hand to hover just above the center of his aching, “Ph-Phillip, may I speak with you in private?” He chides himself for the stammer, half-leaning against the wood of the bleachers.

 

Phillip looked down from the lyra, maintaining his full split. “Oh, what about?”

 

“I-it's too serious to say out loud, can you come back here please? Thank you.” Barnum moves back behind the bleachers, his fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt, a layer of sweat forming under his collar and armpits.

 

After a moment and a few conspiratorial whispers, Phillip turns the corner. “What is this about, Phin-!”

 

Barnum immediately pulls his lover into a fervid, passionate, adrenaline-fueled kiss, trembling as he pulls Phillip impossibly closer, their bodies pressing together.

 

Phillip makes a startled noise, pushing back against his chest. “Phineas what the hell?!”

 

Barnum grabs his partners shoulders, pinning him against a beam, kissing him again with a low but desperate growl, pressing his hips against Phillip's, rutting against him, moaning deep in his throat at the new sensation. “Y-you looked so good out there, I couldn't resist~”

 

Phillip pushes against his chest again, this time much harder, enough to dislodge the ringmaster off of him. “Phineas for God's sake, what has gotten into you!?”

 

Barnum whines, “N-nothing I'm f-fine, I just want you so badly, Phil~” He pushes back up against him and grabs Phillip's ass, bringing their hips together, another soft moan leaving him,

 

The younger man's eyes widen when he feels an intense, hard line of heat against him, “What on Earth-?”

 

Barnum’s knees weaken as a loud sob of exasperation leaves him. “P-please Phil I n-need you it h-hurts so much…” He rocks his hips against him.

 

“What have you done to yourself?!” Phillip looks down, then back up at Phineas, who is completely out of breath, looking nothing like his usual self when he gets this way. Normally he has a suave demeanor to him, never asking for Phillip because Phillip would immediately fall into him, but now Barnum looks like a man desperate for air, begging for sex as if he needed it to live.

 

Barnum whines again, burying his face into Phillip's shoulder, his whole body trembling with want. “ _Phillip…._ ”

 

“How long have you been like this?”

 

Barnum keeps his face buried, nuzzling closer. “A-a while...two hours maybe...I-I don't even remember anymore…” He starts pressing open-mouthed kisses to Phillip's throat, pulling the younger man closer.

 

Phillip promptly shoves him back. “Phineas, we are getting you to a doctor right now-”

 

“ _NO!_ ” Barnum shouts as he lifts his head before quickly shutting his mouth. “N-no doctors..I hate them..”

 

“Phineas Barnum, if you're so insistent that you don't need a doctor then tell me what the hell is going on! How did _this_ happen?” Phillip gestures to Barnum's waist.

 

Barnum follows the gesture with his eyes, remaining silent for a few moments before giving Phillip one last fleeting look. “C-can we talk about this in the office….” He pauses. “Please….?”

 

Phillip sighs through his nose. “Of course, dearest.”

 

The two men go off towards the office, Barnum staying behind him, his head low as he holds onto Phillip's hand, dread and shame washing over him.

 

**\------**

 

Phillip has his head in his hands and Barnum nervously bites his lip after telling Phillip the ordeal of his entire morning.

 

“So let me get this straight..” Phillip groans, lifting his head, he holds up the slip of paper from Barnum's pocket. “You thought it would be a good idea to not only take a highly potent aphrodisiac, but also have quintuple the instructed amount and drink it all at once.”

 

Barnum nods, his hands going between his thighs, rocking his hips against them as he purses his lips.

 

Phillip sighs deeply. “Lord give me strength,” he mutters. “Okay, and you said Miss Yan gave you the powder, correct?”

 

The aroused ringmaster nods his head quickly, moaning in his throat as his legs quiver.

 

“Why didn't you go to her for a remedy-?”

 

“A-and show up looking like this!?” Barnum shouts, gesturing to himself in exasperation. “I already feel like a fucking moron right now for even considering that _God_ awful powder, let alone overdosing on it, and I don't need this rumor spreading around the tent on top of everything else!”

 

Phillip puts a hand on his back. “Phin, deep breaths, it's okay.”

 

Barnum sharply inhales, rocking his hips more, his heart beating quicker. “In hindsight...that was by far the stupidest decision I have ever made.” He bows his head low.

 

Phillip sighs deeply, a soft look on his face. He knows very well Barnum doesn’t think straight at times and at least it's good to see he won't repeat his mistakes anytime soon. “Look, I'll go tell her myself, you don't have to leave the room, and I'll tell the troupe to not disturb you because you're feeling unwell.” He looks down to see Barnum's hips writhing desperately against his hands. “I suppose that isn't completely untrue.”

 

Barnum falls to his side, laying against the couch with his face pressed into a pillow, his hands not moving from their spot between his legs. “ _Shut up_ …”

 

“Well, in a way, I think this could serve as a reminder to not take substances so haphazardly without knowing their full effect...” He chuckles once, putting his hand on Barnum's back, “Why did you take it in the first place? Isn't that intended for people out of their sexual prime? Last I recalled you are quite an active man.”

 

A brief pause.

 

“Ph-Phillip, I….”Barnum goes quiet, swallowing his pride, or at least what's left of it, before whispering, “I was...I was just trying to impress you…”

 

“What?” Phillip asks, a slight laugh on his lips. “What do you mean you wanted to ‘impress’ me?”

 

Barnum looks up at him, still moving his hips. “Y-you're so much more..driven than me, and I'm not saying I don't have sex drive but..”

 

“Is this about last night, Phin?”

 

The ringmaster looks away. He pauses for a few moments before speaking up again, “I just..I felt like I needed to c-compensate..for the fact that I couldn't satisfy you fully.” He thrusts against his hands. “It's a ridiculous insecurity...I shouldn't feel discouraged but-”

 

“Love, don't say that, you don't need to impress me for me to love you and you certainly don't need to hurt yourself because you think you can't keep up. I can take a hint to slow down and if I remain hard, then it's more fun for you to watch.” Phillip leans down to press a kiss to his cheek. “I hope you know I don't love you just for the sex. Even if you were ‘past your prime’ that wouldn't change how much I love you.”

 

Barnum gives him a small smile before groaning from more friction on his cock, a pained sound leaving him as he curls up tighter.

 

Phillip waits before asking, “How bad does it hurt?”

 

Barnum sharply exhales, “O-on a scale from one to ten, I would give it a twenty…”

 

Phillip goes quiet, rubbing circles on his back, whispering soothing words incoherently to him. Barnum whines in his throat, but relaxes slightly.

 

“I'll be right back and once you're not in this state of unrest, we can discuss this.” He runs his hand through Barnum's wavy hair, now slightly damp with sweat. “And I suppose a bath is overdue as well.”

 

Barnum makes a strained sound, leaning into Phillip's palm. His hips twitch as his legs tense up.

 

Phillip casts a worried look. “I'll be back as soon as I can just...sit tight for a few minutes.”

 

Barnum nods, biting down on the pillow to suppress a moan. His face immediately turns fifty degrees hotter, embarrassment nipping at his chest.

 

Phillip sharply inhales, shivering as he stands up and hurrys out the door, giving Barnum one last look before shutting the door quietly. He would rather not linger and risk the ringmaster seeing what this state is doing to him, now was not the time to be thinking on that.

 

Barnum watches as he leaves, immediately picking up his writhing.

 

**\------**

 

Barnum wonders if this is how he's going to die: hard, aching, and sweaty.

 

He doesn't even recall how long it's been, all he knows is it's been far too long. Barnum is damn certain he's come as much as he could, yet his cock still hardens after every orgasm.

 

He's lying face up, his eyes focusing on the ceiling to avoid his mind going back to his...predicament. Barnum has long since given up on trying to jerk himself off, his cock is now too sensitive to even graze his fingers over. For now, his hands remain on the couch, digging into the fabric until his knuckles turned white.

 

Barnum buries his face into the pillow he's lying on, panting and groaning as he tries to get somewhat comfortable until Phillip returns. He doesn’t even realize he’s begun to writhe on the couch once again, never ceasing movement for even a second. The blood pumping in his ears is deafening, the sound of his own heart rapidly beating against his ribcage making it almost impossible to relax. Barnum closes his eyes, trying his best to calm his heart, but to no avail. All he sees behind his eyelids are images of his lover tied down, moaning and panting as he sees himself tease him until he cries-

  
  
Barnum sits straight up, abandoning all hope of being able to rest. He turns behind him, noticing the pillow has fallen to the ground. He bites his lip as he picks it up, holding it to his chest for a moment as he contemplates what his lower brain is telling him. He looks towards the door one last time before groaning to himself, burying his face into the pillow before laying down on his stomach, and putting the small pillow right over his groin.

  
  
Barnum can’t believe he’s stooped this low, what kind of chemical could have been in that powdered menace to make his brain lose all function and self respect? He decides to question this later, right now he can feel his cock twitching with the need for more friction.

  
  
Barnum rolls his hips once on the pillow, a short gasp leaving him from the new sensation on his clothed groin. He rolls his hips again, holding the pillow in place with his hands as he starts to thrust onto it steady and hard. He bites down on the fabric of the couch as he moans, moving quicker and quicker as his desire spikes once again, an unbearable heat threatening to consume him.

  
  
As he moves, his vision tunnels, the room goes quiet aside from the sound of his own heart moving wildly. Barnum releases the couch from his teeth, moaning high and loud as he moves like an animal in a rut, his eyes fluttering shut when he feels himself getting closer and closer once again.

  
  
His orgasm takes him by surprise. He shouts loudly, almost painfully, as his release wettens the fabric of his pants and the poor silk pillow. Barnum keeps moving until he slumps like a dead weight, gulping in air as if he were drowning in his own pleasure.

  
  
Now, he finally feels a moment of respite, a break from the endless torture his body had put him under. Barnum feels lightheaded, his body still warm and his heart still pounding, but now he relaxes finally, his eyes barely able to stay open until the whole room fades to black.

**\------**

  
Barnum doesn’t know what wakes him up first, the sound of his partner’s singing, or the pleasant aroma now filling the office space, clearing the fogginess in his head.

  
  
Phillip is humming in the far corner of the office, making tea in the kitchenette. Barnum hardly recalls the events that had taken place a few hours ago, they all seem like a distant memory or a very bothersome dream. Barnum looks down to notice he’s wearing different clothes altogether, a blanket draped over him.

  
  
Barnum sits up with a groan, running a hand through his hair.

  
  
The young man looks over from his corner with a small grin on his face. “Ah, you’re awake finally, I was beginning to think you’d driven yourself into a coma.” Barnum can hear his sarcasm.

  
  
“Phil?” he looks around the office once again, then back towards his partner, “What..happened?”

  
  
“You passed out.” Phillip says as he picks up a cup of something that smells absolutely heavenly. “I came back here to find you on the couch knocked out cold as well as a complete mess.”

  
  
Barnum covers his face with a heavy sigh. “Right..”

  
  
“And my pillow didn’t exactly escape unscathed either.” Phillip takes a seat next to Barnum, passing the cup to him. “Here, drink this.”

  
  
Before Barnum can form an apology, the pleasant smell goes all throughout his body as he quickly takes the cup, tentatively sipping. The taste is indescribably excellent, almost like his favorite tea mixed with the flavoring of Irish Cream but without the alcohol content.

  
  
“What is this?”

  
  
“After speaking with Miss Yan, she offered me this remedy, apparently it’s not the first time she’s encountered a man who tried his luck with this aphrodisiac and failed, so she gladly gave me some after I explained your whole...situation.”

  
  
Barnum can’t hide a blush on his cheeks. He sips the drink again, feeling a soothing coolness throughout his body, then a therapeutic warmth, a pleasant counterpart to the heat he’s felt for most of the day.

  
  
“But it appeared that by the time I got back most of it was out of your system.” Phillip leans on his shoulder. “I was beginning to worry a little..well maybe not a little, more like a bothersome amount of worry.”

  
  
Barnum drinks from the cup once more, then sets it down. “I..I’m sorry, darling, I shouldn’t have kept my insecurities to myself..I just didn’t want you to have to worry about me on top of everything else bothering you.” He pauses. “It was selfish of me and-”

  
  
“Phineas.” Phillip cups his face. “You don’t have to apologize to me, just promise me you won’t hurt yourself like that again, Miss Yan told me that men have died from taking that and I was scared I was going to lose you.” He kisses Barnum softly. “Just remember that you can talk to me about this kind of thing, okay? I’m your partner, I’m here for you and I promise you that you won’t be burdening me if something is truly bothering you and you want to talk about it.”

  
  
Barnum smiles, kissing his partner back. “I promise, love.” He grabs Phillip’s hand, squeezing it.

  
  
“Good.” Phillip kisses him on the forehead, putting them together, “Now, after you finish your tea, we’re going to head home and get you in a bath. Then afterwards we can just sleep for the rest of the evening. There’s no show tonight so I put Anne and Miss Yan in charge of full rehearsal.”

  
  
Barnum hums, picking up the cup and taking another drink, his eyelids already feeling heavy.

  
  
“And because you were out for some time, I managed to finish up the paperwork so there’s no need to worry about being behind on finances. The ticket sales were steady enough last show so we have enough money to pay for rent, pay the troupe, and some extra on top of it.”

  
  
The ringmaster finishes up the cup, yawning as he leans down to lay on Phillip’s lap, “Mmhm…”

  
  
Phillip looks down at him with a small smile on his face. “Do you need me to be quiet for a moment?”

  
  
Barnum shakes his head, yawning again as he curls up into a ball.

  
  
“Well, what would you like me to talk about?”

  
  
“Anything..” Barnum pulls the blanket around him, nuzzling into Phillip.

  
  
Phillip huffs a small laugh and keeps talking until Barnum falls asleep in his lap, finally at ease.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I swear these two are going to be the death of me...  
> First ever smut fic completed! I'm still getting into the habit of it but I hope it turned out okay :D  
> If you want to see more of my art or other ramblings you can follow me at nerdy-snowflake on tumblr and deviantart
> 
> Anyways I hope you enjoy and have a lovely day/evening  
> ~PT


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